K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
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I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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