shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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