Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
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If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
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On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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