Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
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The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
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Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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