K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize