You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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