we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize