you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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