So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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