I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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