I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Don't tell me you're on acid again
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
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