I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Found your dick twin last night
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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