she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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