were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
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you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
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All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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