I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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