know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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