my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
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In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
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I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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