i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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