Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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