I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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