you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
You took a bar mat shot.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
You're a waste of cheezeits
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
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