My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize