I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
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Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
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Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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