I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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