Umm I'm too high to move.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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