pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize