we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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