I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize