whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
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He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Randomize