the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
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What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
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At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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