If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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