Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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