I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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