this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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