i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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