Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize