pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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