dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
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she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
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My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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