with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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