I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
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