am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
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