May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize