Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
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