A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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