What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize