yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Randomize