I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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