Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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