if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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