We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize